Bring your best self to light - January 2008
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Make 2008 the year of the minor modification..
Normally at the beginning of this year, we are bombarded with messages about getting thinner, richer, healthier...usually punctuated with examples of people who have followed X's method and as a result got thinner, richer, and happier. It's interesting to me to see the assumption that our happiness rests on achievement of this...but I'd like to propose an alternative approach for 2008..something that's both a bit easier and more challenging...
- Stretch out your time line. : Let's say you want to lose weight and "get fitter" (whatever that means). Instead of saying "I want to lose 2 stone in 2 months"..consider saying that in 2008 I'm going to lose 2 stone over the year by making small modifications to my life style e.g. eat half the chocolate bar, park further away and walk and set small monthly goals e.g. lose 1 - 1.5 lbs a month...not as dramatic as the 2 stone in 2 months...but probably a hell of a lot more sustainable.
- Acknowledge others: Niall Mellon (he of the South African building project) described in an interview with Charles Handy (The Social Entrepreneurs) how a chance compliment got him started on his sales career. Look in your own life. Acknowledge the contributions of others. Acknowledge your own contributions. Make the effort to affirm and compliment others. When you see something good, comment on it. More people leave jobs due to lack of recognition than because of money. I guarantee it will help transform your relationships. Begin by thanking your family at home for whatever they do (however small it seems!)
- Develop an anonymous kindness habit: Be kinder in your daily life. Examples of these include: picking up rubbish instead of leaving it there, choosing to let other drivers in front of you, giving a thank you gift to the people who serve you in ordinary ways (e.g. library, post office). Choose a small practice and see how much better it will make you feel and you are also contributing to making the world a kinder place. Make it a practice and make it simple.
- Choose to be happy: I'm sure you are muttering.."it's easy for her...." but I do believe happiness is a choice. Yes, you can feel absolutely crap...but know that it will pass. It will stop raining (well...at some stage in Ireland!), the hurt will heal.
- Simplify, simplify, simplify: We are constantly told that we need MORE: another car, a different TV, new clothes. but what about if you make this year about choosing to buy less, consume less, get rid of stuff...create space in your life. Why not choose a month in which you are not going to purchase anything new. That means there is no dithering about "do I want it?". Your default position is NO...and notice the increase in peace of mind (no more difficult purchasing decisions) and finances...or just begin by cleaning out a drawer...
- Grow your integrity: When I complete the feedback for people's free goals reports on my website www.annewalshcoach.com , frequent themes are indecision, procrastination. I suspect a lot of that comes from people's lack of self-trust. You see, we make promises to ourselves and then we break them. We say we will do one thing and then do another. If you have someone like this in your life..the chances are you don't trust them. So why should you trust yourself in the same situation? Scale down your promises to yourself and work on honouring them. Become someone YOU can trust and the chances are your indecision and procrastination will begin to fade. Make and keep minor promises to yourself and it will become easier to keep bigger ones.
- Watch your mouth: This is particularly relevant for families. I often think we seriously underestimate the impact of our negative words on our family and friends. We make excuses: oh, I was stressed, she's impossible, he started it. But you can get up and walk away..if someone wants to begin a tug of war...YOU do not have to pick up the rope. Consider choosing silence instead of snapping...at least sometimes! It's simple, but not easy.
Take Action!
- There is a concept in Japanese culture called kaizen. This is the art of the small regular change. What's your kaizen for 2008?
- Next time there is a family argument and the old dreary path is opening up in front of you..don't pick up the rope...walk away..
- How could you learn to trust yourself more? What would be a small change?
- Make this your "NO year". Choose a month (even a week) to make no new unnecessary purchases. Pause and reflect before taking on any new time commitments? What will have to go to accommodate this?
- Commit to a kindness habit
- What IS working for you in your life? Is there anything you have learned in these areas that you could apply in other areas? consciousness shifting session to give you a quick start.
Now What coaching?
I'm planning to take on TWO new clients only next month for this process. If you feel as though you want a change but want a clear process that focusses on the WHO more so than the WHAT...this is the process for you...You can read about it here. You can also read more about the originator of the process at: www.laurabermanfortgang.com and www.nowwhatcoaching.com
Consciousness shifting
I'm feeling really excited and humbled by the effects of this work. It can help shift/reduce blocks that have been there for years..
I'm offering complimentary sessions to all readers of this newsletter and you can read some of the testimonials here.
I'm offering complimentary sessions for this and you can now book it online. All the January sessions are gone...but there are still slots left for February.
If you have availed of your complimentary session and wish to book another one..you can do so here..remember there is a discount for readers of this newsletter!
Bits & Pieces -
Spiritual practice
Spirituality and practice: This website gives lots of interesting ways to help identify your own spiritual practice. If you are interesting in developing your own spiritual practice...this will give you some ideas.
Revamped Genius!
I'm a big fan of Michael Neill's work and his website: www.geniuscatalyst.com has recently had a revamp...check it out!
Recommended - what I'm reading/watching
Rome (the series): I got this on DVD a few months back but I'm only getting to see it episode by episode. That's what happens when you try to watch over 18 DVD's with a 12 year old in the house <g>.but so far I'm really enjoying it. Ciarán Hinds is excellent as Julius Caesar and the friendship between Pullo and Vorenus is fascinating.
Tess Gerritsen: Tess has become one of my favourite crime authors. She writes a cracking good read with interesting characters that we can grow and develop with over time.