Bring your best self to light - May 2008
We grow by recommendation. If you have found this useful, please forward to others. There is an unsubscribe link at the bottom of every e-mail.
If this has been forwarded to you from someone else, you can sign up at www.annewalshcoach.com. You get a free 10 part e-course called Personal Freedom when you do...
17 ways to build confidence....quickly and permanently!
In Irish, self-confidence translates as self-trust...and I suppose that's what self-confidence means to me...it's about trusting yourself..listening to the inner guidance system, but a fundamental trust in yourself which means that even when things don't go as planned...it's not the end of the world...here are some tips that both I (and others!) have to help build that fundamental self-trust.
- Be brutally honest with yourself: If you want to trust yourself, be willing to tell yourself the truth about a situation...even if it's uncomfortable and even if you choose to do nothing about it right now...
- Courage outside the comfort zone: when you choose to do something that is difficult or outside your comfort zone...even if it does not go well...salute yourself for your courage and celebrate your willingness to take that step
- Assume good intentions on the part of others. Generally people want you to do well and perform to a high standard...don't assume that people want you to fail...they don't
- List of achievements: Cheryl Richardson mentions this in one of her newsletters. Prepare a list of your skills and achievements and use that to boost your confidence when you feel a bit wobbly.
- Draw on the past: Think of the times you have overcome challenges. Remind yourself you can do it again.
- Breathe deeply: This can be very useful if you are going into some sort of live performance situation. Breath in through the nose and out through the mouth
- You are loved: No matter what happens you have people who love you...always remember that.
- Prepare as much as you can: Preparation for an event has something intrinsically confidence-building about it. Learn everything you can do before hand and then stop. I believe you can prepare up to 80% but the final 20% happens on the day.
- Practise being present: No matter what happens...YOU CAN handle it if you deal with it moment by moment.
- Hand pick your advisors: Some people (and we all know them) spend more time asking for 15 different people's opinions about a situation and then feel upset because they get 15 different solutions. YOU are the final arbiter of any decision. Only ask for one or two people's opinions and then make it clear you will make up your own mind.
- Use a big timescale: Will this matter a year from now? 5 years? 10 years? Maybe but not as much as you think. Draw comfort from the fact that world history will probably not undergo major changes because of your success or otherwise in this endeavour.
- Learn from smarter people than you: Spend some time exploring how people you admire build their confidence. Experiment with some of the techniques.
- True confidence is about YOU shining. Michael Neill has a wonderful metaphor about us. We are fundamentally a shining diamond but we cover it up with manure and then lash varnish on top! Take a chance on being yourself, speaking your truth and notice how liberating and easy that can feel!
- Doubt your doubt: yes, that voice in your head is saying that you can't do it, and you are mad and have you thought of this or this or this...but suppose THAT VOICE IS WRONG!!! Maybe the encouraging hopeful voice is more valid...and more indicative of reality..
- Get an anchor: I have to say this doesn't work for me..but it works for lots of others...essentially it's a technique from NLP (neuro linguistic programming). The idea is to reconnect or imagine yourself in a confident resourceful state and then create a physical anchor (e.g. clench your fist, press forefinger and index finger together). Use that gesture to recreate that state.
- Ask yourself what you want: Get into the habit of asking yourself on a regular basis what you want...about small things and it will get easier to tune into your own navigation system when it comes to deciding what you do want.
- Know yourself: The better you know yourself the easier it will be to be more confident. Take some personality assessments (e.g. Enneagram) so you get to know your own strengths and flash points better.
Take Action!
Now What coaching?
If you have recently been made redundant (or if it looks as though it could happen!)and are thinking about a career change..this process could be ideal for you...You can read about it here. You can also read more about the originator of the process at: www.laurabermanfortgang.com and www.nowwhatcoaching.com
Consciousness shifting
I'm still offering
complimentary sessions to all readers of this newsletter
and you can read some more of the testimonials
here.
Note that there are three other coaches now available at this link: Eileen, Ewa
and Jan
so if you can't get an appointment with me at the time you want, book in with
one of these two ladies. We've been trained around the same time..Ewa is
from Poland so if you know any Polish speakers that you think might be
interested in the work...please forward this to them. Here are some testimonials
I feel calmer and clearer and have been able to stop pressurising myself to run around in circles looking (perhaps) like I’m taking action but actually just spinning myself deeper.
On Tuesday I had a meeting with someone who I now am planning a joint venture with. He is an extremely well connected and well established guy and I cannot imagine how that meeting would have gone if I had still been “in the fog” that I was in before my session with you. I certainly doubt that I could have impressed him.The clarity I’m experiencing just feels normal!
I have tried out saying to myself “I’m nothing if I’m not helping someone” and it has simply stopped resonating. The fear and panic that was bringing up has just gone.I have experienced loads of different helping techniques and practiced some of them myself and have to say your Consciousness Shifting session has certainly shifted me.One always hopes for something like this as a result and on this occasion I was not only not disappointed I am delighted. Mica May (www.extraordinaryballs.com)
Thank you so much for the coaching session: I was sceptical at first, even to the extent that I doubted if you were even a real person at the end of the line! I was unsure what to expect, but I found the whole process enlightening, fascinating and insightful.
My intention statement and state of being statements I have found very useful and they both feel very true for me. I have now found myself focusing on these intentions and this has given me more clarity into my situation. Lucy Richards
If you have availed of your complimentary session and wish to book another one..you can do so here..remember there is a discount for readers of this newsletter!
Bits & Pieces -
TED
www.ted.com . This has lots of stuff about science etc...and is really interesting..
Alison Grimston is a GP who practises holistic medicine and also helps to heal animals with holistic therapies...click here to read her blog
I'm always on the look out for new exciting crime writers and got this via a fellow crime fiction aficiando (Dolores, you know who you are!). It's about ritual magic but has also introduced me to two new crime detectives I hope to meet again: Flea Marley and Jack Caffery. However I notice that she has not received rave reviews for this novel...so looking forward to reading the rest!
Recommended - what I'm reading/watching
Matrix Trilogy: I treated myself recently to a Matrix trilogy and thoroughly enjoyed the whole lot. Keanu Reeves can jump into my living room any time...and it definitely repays repeated viewing..